Something Ive noticed is whenever im up long enough on meth dreams start coming through while im still awake. I know for a fact I hadnt gone to sleep but I start remembering new dreams with details from the same day so i know theyre not old dreams. Theres always real bad feelings accompanied with the dreams.

Sometimes its hard to tell whether what I just dreamt happened or not I have to examine the details to come to the conclusion it was a dream.

Anyone ever had the same thing happen?

This post has been edited by Xochipilli: Jun 11 2007, 06:54 PM

Yes, I had. And may I suggest please that it is not a good sign.

Also I would like to add that the real problem starting when you get unable to understand IF it is a dream or not.

I have seen in another threads people suggesting to you to stop meth, so I won’t tell it to you one more time. It’s really your choice.

Do you also “remember” more than one “chain of fact” as being what has happened for the same occasion and being unable to distinguish which (if any of them) is the real one?

Having punished myself with my eyes closed yet wide awake, thinking whats the point Ill never do this again. I can relate to your query. Regardless of the complications from chemical use/abuse, Assuming you are already in that state I would try to change the channel in your head and fixate on a positive vibe or mantra. Dont get caught up in "negative" thought patterns. .Ive felt the presence of an entity while coming down, Just before id fall asleep a mega fear rush jolts me awake and i feel something there
Not a pleasant experience. Advice: Change the channel, Eat, and sleep.

I can tell that its dreams im remembering im just saying they come in so subtly it makes no sense at all. I was wide awake the whole time but im starting to remember these dreams as if my mind was 2 places at once. I remember dreams which should have took some time but I was awake the whole time and dont remember actually dreaming them I only have the memories of them. I thought once or twice im just remembering old dreams but I get details from the same day so its impossible they coulda been old dreams. Always a real bad feeling associated with the memories. Im not talking about just a mildly bad feeling im talking about some of the worst feelings Ive ever had like a relative died or something.

I hardly ever touch the shit I only mention drugs were involved to give you the details. Enough mad shit happens in a couple of nights of sleep dep to write a whole book on.

Looks like you know exactly what im talking about ledbelly. The worst is always right before i go to sleep. The voices usually find a way to scare the shit outta me then I feel like im vibrating until I get to sleep. I real uncomfortable vibrating feeling too nothing like the feeling you get taking ecstasy or other drugs that make you vibrate.

The problem with talking about this is the minute I mention drugs people automatically just say "stop taking drugs" but its not the drugs im talking about here its the things that happen in my head while im on them. Mad things. Not everyone hears voices while sleep deprived and it never happened to me up until one day I started anticipating it for some reason. I know for a fact it was my belief that triggered it. The day before someone was going on about hypnosis and the occult and the ideas obviously lodged in my subconscious because I got the impression I was talking to that person telepathically but it didnt take me long to realize theres no way that person had the skill to do that otherwise they would have said something then I started wondering if its not a person im talking to what the hell is it?

Maybe thats why people are saying stop doing dope. Its just a suggestion.

Back in the day when I used to smoke dope sometimes I'd stay up for several days on end. Before I'd crash I'd experience a variety of physical senstations from twitching to vibrations. Sometimes I'd get unusually arosed and sometimes I'd have sex with my partner at the time for several hours on end having multiple orgasms and such. I'd see things like little bugs everywhere and I'd itch. Sometimes I'd hear voices or see colors and other such things. See the brain actually can only stay awake for so long. So when pas that 3 day mark you're awake and able to control your body yet if we hooked you up to some machines your brain would appear as though you were asleep. When you dream when you're awake you're hallucinating. YOu might call it dreaming but you've induced halluncinations.

In all my ignorance of such a beautiful language, again I say: Xochipilli...no-tlamachilia mo-oh-hui amo cualli tehhuatl ihuan mo cochiztli acocholoa amo acuallotl patli. ("Prince of flowers...I think your path isnt good, you and your dreams need no wicked medicine").

This post has been edited by ASH007: Jun 13 2007, 09:42 AM

Can you elaborate on that ASH? You mean its my path thats causing such negative side effects that come with sleep deprivation?

When you say my path what do you mean? The fact that im using chemicals and sleep deprivation to learn things? I learn so much about the mind and myself in the space of about 30 hours when its all said and done im left with anything but regrets but then again I think theres a price to pay for taking shortcuts to learning these kind of lessons.

Like I said i havent taken any drugs at all in about 4 months but the last time i did i learned all sorts of things but again i thought I was going to die. I even checked myself into the hospital because I was getting a burning plastic smell everywhere i went and I got the impression it was my brain i was smelling.

A voice kept repeating the word "serendepity" and when i looked in teh dictionary the next day it made complete sense. I was stumbling upon all these realizations without any conscious effort. Its as if my mind was showing me vulnerabilities and preying on them so id do something about them. I had all sorts of signs and synchronicity too. Not good ones though unfortunately. Nothing positive about them. They all had to do with the notion that I was too much of a free thinker and I had one foot in the grave because of it.

By the way what language is that Quechua?

This post has been edited by Xochipilli: Jun 13 2007, 01:15 PM

Xochipilli...allow us to work from the end to the beginning. The language you ask of is Nahuatl. Its living and spoken language of the Mexica (Aztec) because its still spoken in various parts of Mexico. (link)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nahuatl

Im sure your aware...but Ill say it anyways...your name is Nahuatl for "Prince of Flowers"
Xochipilli was the god of love, games, beauty, dance, flowers, maize, and song in Aztec mythology. (link)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xochipilli

Hes also on the Mexican currency. 100 pesos equivalent to 10 US dollars (link)http://www.mexico-azteca.com/Monnaie/100pesosr.jpg

Heres a quote from that article "In the mid-1800s, a 16th-century Aztec statue of Xochipilli was unearthed on the side of the volcano Popocatépetl near Tlamanalco. The statue is of a single figure seated upon a temple-like base. Both the statue and the base upon which it sits are covered in carvings of sacred and psychoactive plants including mushrooms etc." Keep in mind that many of the ancients used psychoactive drugs for various reasons, including but not limited to: divination, communication with the gods, enlightenment etc. So its easy to see that Xochipilli has some connection to this. Apart from being the god of dance, music was very important in all of the Mexica rituals...to this day they continue to be. Why you chose this name...or why it was given to you is another topic. "Serendipity." Perhaps. But what have you found? What has found you? I have read some of your threads and they seem riddled with questions instead of revelations, or answers to something your in search of. People still use psychoactive drugs as an aid toward whatever journey their going on. I know. Cause I did the same with mushrooms, acid, and a little weed. Thing is...it wasnt fun anymore when I became a full blown heroin addict. Sure I stayed up a few days myself slamming crystal...I was sprung on the needle...everything was shot up. No smoke or rails. Anyhow, thats one of the reasons why I find myself here. The thing to keep in mind is...why do you continue to use after all the things youve been exposed to. If you tried running across a highway and got hit by a car would you do it again? Why continue on that path of self-destruction? If you insist on using...crystal is synthetic. Its not natural. Highly dangerous after prolonged use. If you insist on using for religious/magical reasons you should do it in the company of others...something like a "Maria Sabina" type thing. (link)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maria_Sabina

Ill be honest with you. Im a recovering drug addict. Ive been clean a little over 2 years. The thing I had to learn the hard way was...its not so much the amount and the times you use...its your reaction to the drugs when it is that you use. For example: some people use three times a day, every day, and end up in jail. Others, use once in a while and just totally f%#k things up. A real life Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Remember...I speak of myself and myself only.

Your path. Doesnt seem a good one because as I mentioned before...you end up with more questions than answers. Questions of your inner self and no inner peace. It doesnt seem like enlightment to me if you have not and can not seem to face your traumas, complexities, frustrations, and resentments. You only seem to add more of them. You seem to close yourself to life. Life and its lessons arent expensive, last time I checked, theres no bill to pay...they are taught to you when youre ready. Its all over this forum...little leaguers shouldnt be trying to play in the world series. You and your dreams need no wicked medicine...sleep and its dream state are natural cycles. I think its unwise to tamper with nature in this way. You posted a thread about some dream herb, yet spend days awake. Not too long ago I had problems with insomnia and tried valerian, wasnt too bad. I hope I dont offend you. Tlazocamati. This is a poem I read at the following site:http://www.freewebs.com/tecpaocelotl/poetry.htm

and I quote:
"Tochihuitzin Coyolchiuhqui
One of my favorite poets. This poem is about how life itself is an illusion.

Thus spoke Tochihuitzin,
thus spoke Coyolchiuhqui:
We only rise from sleep,
we only come to dream,
it is not true, it is not true,
that we come on earth to live.
As an herb in springtime,
so is our nature.
Our hearts give birth, make sprout,
the flowers of our flesh.
Some open their corollas,
then they become dry.
Thus spoke Tochihuitzin,
thus spoke Coyolchiuhqui."

Check this out:
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/...70613071111.htm

If you think you had a spiritual experience thats what you had. However I can't really say much other than what it sounds like to me was you were under the influence of a power nuerological stimulant and that everything you experienced, the waking dream state and various other hallucinations are nothing more than a result of that. I've experienced just about everything you said other than going to the hospital. HOwever if it got that bad I hope you realize the potential affect the drug can have on you and I really hope you understand that you if you do use meth again after this it would be very hard for me to believe you are not an addict. You can try to minimize your situation claiming you only do it so often - my sister goes on benders about once every 3 or so months yet she is a drug addict and probably will be for many years. You can try to justify doing the drug for the purpose of learning and yet if you continue to use these "short" cuts I don't think you really learned the most important lesson - you thought you were going to die. You went to the hospital because of it. Unless you have a death wish - the next time you just might die which is the highest price you can pay. And I garuntee that if you do it again it will take much less dope to feel similar affects. Its like taste aversion aquired from vommiting. You're body now associates the feelings of near death with the drug and using it again will undoubtly cause it to happen again, imho.

Ultimately I say live and let live. If you choose to do meth again fine, no judgement call from me, live free or die trying man. But stop kidding yourself and consider that maybe the real reason why you did this was to satisfy some craving, that maybe you really are a drug addict. Now again no judgement on my part you live your life. BUt try to understand from my point of view, from what you've described in this thread and I think 2 others, you do come off as somebody who is a drug addict who uses mystical purposes as a scape goat. I'm not trying to be offense here I'm calling it as it see it.

Take care and be safe.

Eh dreaming while awake? (By the way no I dont take/do drugs), I have had that happen to me quite a few times recently, well its been months since the last but still. It is weird, it starts off as me thinking of something and usually after a long period of being awake (it can be happening on any normal night that i just cant fall asleep, other times after an entire night without sleeping, this rarely happens and a never go 2 days in a row without sleeping so its not something serious) I go into a dream which I can pretty much tell what I am doing (usually aware that I am dreaming) and always in these strange things happen, just they seem very realistic and much more real than a normal dream, heh in one I had to fight with a shadow like figure -- ok it got kinda weird but eh I won ^^;. Lol anyway I also experience seeing alot of weird things when I also dont sleep the night, I think I become more aware of what is truly around me, and see more transparent forms sometimes.

Also on that note, when I have the awake-like dream, I know I don't fall asleep, sometimes during it I drift back to normal conciousness (no not like when you awake) but usually it just goes back to where I was before I drifted to concioussness (I return to where I was and continue there) Meh if anyone has any insight I would be THANKFUL if you can enlighten me ^^!!

This post has been edited by The_B: Jun 24 2007, 02:38 AM

I am not sure how is called in English, what you describing, but I think that Xochifilli was referring to something different. If, again, I understood correctly what you describing, I am also doing this without any drugs, as long as I can remember myself. Consciously bring a subject into my mind, then relaxing and letting the story develop with visual effect by itself, without interfering (unless it take an undesired turn, in which case interrupting). I find it very pleasing.

I understood on the other hand Xochifilli to refer to a specific situation which is consequence of drug use. What he told brought in my mind a picture (like a frame) from the beginning of a period of my life, more than 10 years ago. From that period I have almost absolutely no memory (for the better, from one point of view).

For me at least the most characteristic feature of it, was finding in my mind a story fully developed (even if thinking about it was reviling more details), which was always frustrating and unpleasant, nightmarish. And since I knew it not to being true and also knew that I hadn’t slept, my conclusion also, was “dreams while awake”. I also avoided calling them delusions, because that would mean that I had to do something about it and I didn’t wanted to.

Sometimes I'll wake up from a dream but my body will still be asleep. Now if I wanted to I could open my eyes and I would quickly wake up after wards but instead I try to keep myself as asleep as possible and try to use that state of mind for trance work. So far I've experienced "half" dreams - vivid imagry and sensations but not nearly as much as in a regular dream. I've also only been able to hold this state for a about 10 minutes or so. Usually either I wake up or fall back asleep. Its difficult to induce this trance while awake and so far I've had the most success right after I was already asleep.