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 How to get more self-confidence and..., I wish to know how to become better
Prudence
post Dec 28 2005, 01:56 PM
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PLEASE (IMG:style_emoticons/default/cc_hang.gif) don't kill me for this...I don't believe in myself, i know very little,and everything i tried to do have failed or i didn't get much from it.Should I just quit doing this?There are more people like I am,comfused from others.(I don't know why am i trying,i think that I won't get any answer probably...)

This post has been edited by Prudence: Dec 28 2005, 02:04 PM


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bym
post Dec 28 2005, 05:05 PM
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Prudence,
I never did get an email back from you about the issues you had brought up earlier...?
This is a discussion Forum about occult related topics though self-confidence does play a very important part in Magic. I suggest that you find a personal counselor before delving too deeply into the occult.... Look, mundane life can really be stressful let alone dealing with spirit/spiritual issues. Magic and the occult is one area that one should try to be together before you start messing with it. I'm saying this as a friendly bit of advice, not to discourage you but to encourage you to keep a proper perspective with your life.
One more bit of advice....If you have a question, ask it. Don't sort of worm around the issue with negative aspersions. It starts the conversation off in a negative light and you'll find that it will kill the issues rapidly. For example...this posting should be approached like this (as a probable avenue):
"Hello! I seem to be having doubts about getting into the occult because of self-confidence issues. Everything I attempt has little effect. I know that there are others that feel this way also...does anyone out there have any good ideas as how to solve this problem?" I hope that was a fair assessment as to your original query. Can you see the difference? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/help.gif)

This was moved here as being a more appropriate place for this post. -Mod Squad

This post has been edited by bym: Dec 28 2005, 05:11 PM


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mediocracy
post Dec 29 2005, 01:43 AM
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Prudence, you are (according to the PM you sent me) 11 years old. You are learning more and more about the world around you and it can be very confusing. You are also trying to learn about yourself and this is also confusing.

Try and remember that you are not going to be perfect at everything you do. You get out what you put in. I have started a martial art, but i'm not very good, but thats okay because I just started and I know i'll get better at it.

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A_Smoking_Fox
post Jan 11 2006, 01:52 PM
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self confidence is over rated, why do you even care about things like this.
Why do you care what others think.

Self confidence is something you need when you feel you have to have some value compared to others. When you feel you have to be someone.

Let it all go, don't care what others think, don't care about what you think about yourself. Just live and act. Enjoy life wherever you can. Savour the taste of your food, the smell of the air. etc... everytime you can, and empty your mind off all nonsense

If you stop thinking about your life and confidence and start living it, if you make your mind empty of such thoughts, if you do not think your thoughts are worth noticing, then you will be free of this little and
non-existent problem.


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bym
post Jan 11 2006, 04:34 PM
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One needs to establish self worth before one can seek an egoless path. Being a muted doormat makes for an unhappy life. Believe in yourself, let altruism wait until you are ready and have the self confidence to follow that path. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wacko.gif)


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http://www.sacred-magick.org/index.php?showtopic=7662

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Satarel
post Jan 12 2006, 05:52 AM
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Just remember though, that no matter what you may think, you are you. You decide who you are and how you act. So on that basis alone, you don't really need to figure out how "good" you are at something.

Self-confidence stems from understanding that even if you fail, you can't really stop yourself from moving forwards. So don't worry about screwing up - it's only a "screw up" if you think of it that way - instead try to figure out where you went wrong and learn from it, and that'll turn it into an advantage.


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The value of an individual is not numerically assignable. Given the individual's infinite capacity to affect change (for better or for worse), it follows that their value is just as infinite. Logically then, not only are all individuals of equal value, but all possible combinations and groupings of individuals are of equal value, and finally, no matter an individual's past actions, their capacity to affect positive change is not diminished.

The value of the individual is sacrosanct, but actions must be directed in an effort to affect positive change.

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A_Smoking_Fox
post Jan 12 2006, 01:22 PM
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how is it possible to screw up?
What can you do wrong.

If you do not worry about trivial things, screwing up, and the need for self confidence does not exist.

QUOTE
Being a muted doormat makes for an unhappy life

That is true only partially. there is no reason to keep your opinions to yourself all the time.
But muting the voici in your head that makes you feel un-confident is necesarry. Ignore that voice, ridicule that voice. Do not think your self confidence is important.

Cling to a lack of self confidence, and keep it a life. It should not be fought, it should be ridiculed and forgotten, for the illusion it is. If you feed it you are just keeping it alive.


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A_Smoking_Fox
post Jan 12 2006, 01:25 PM
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goe trough life, smiling, enjoying and ridiculing yourself. If you dot worry what others think, if you do not think anything about yorself. Then you will have achieved something of great worth.

If you measure yourself you are only destroying your confidence. Why should we be measured at all? We are all brothers and sisters, equally seeking hapyness.


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Praxis
post Mar 30 2006, 09:52 AM
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Many systems for spiritual development, personal growth, etc... pivot on the dynamic of shifting from fear to confidence.

Confidence includes relationing with the environment, and thus also includes relationing with other people - however, I consider the strongest foundation for any such relationships to begin with cultivating one's realization of centeredness, one's purpose, and one's procedures for considering and engaging life.

Developing confidence begins with becoming aware of what fear is, becoming aware of how one reacts when afraid. Once one is so aware, then the contrast to such fear and such actions can be clarified. When one is clear about contrasting confident perspective and behaviour, then one can take progressive steps for ceasing to fearfully react by re-centering, re-acknowledging and re-affirming purpose, then acting based upon confidence instead.

Yes, it is that simple to write.
However, that does not mean for a moment that it is [i]easy[/] to do.

One way to begin is by exploring formal (and, yes, I dare say: ritual) meditative exercises that cultivate awareness and centeredness. When awareness exercises are done long enough, awareness can be applied for considering the source of fear and resultant fearful behavior. When centering exercises are done long enough, one establishes a "grounded base" on which one can put the metaphysical feet, and from which one can then choose and actualize contrasting confidence motivated behaviors.

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Star
post Mar 30 2006, 02:43 PM
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Oops. I saw that you seem taken care of.

Good luck in your journeys!

This post has been edited by Star: Mar 30 2006, 02:44 PM

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