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Iamu
post Mar 27 2005, 09:52 AM
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Seems like it's about time we christen this forum...


I'm working on a novella, and looking for some feedback.

Here's about 1/2 of the first chapter, but it stands on it's own, in that it's got almost an episodic feel to it... there's only gonna be 4 or 5 long chapters, anyway. I got about 20 pages more in hard copy, so if this generates any interest, I'll have some or all of that up soon.

http://thebrahmanator.tripod.com/writing/flight.doc

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Radiant Star
post Mar 27 2005, 10:06 AM
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Hmmm, I went for a look and the site appears to be empty... ? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/shok.gif)

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Iamu
post Mar 27 2005, 11:19 AM
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Sorry... turns out tripod is actually run by Nazis.

Hopefully I've circumnavigated their bullshit protections this time:

http://thebrahmanator.tripod.com/flight.htm

Thanks for reading.

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ages0ne
post Mar 29 2005, 09:44 PM
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QUOTE
It’s too big; everything comes out sideways, and before ya know it, you’ve said all there is to say without even having made it to the story, yet. I used to think there’s no place to start telling something like this. Now I’m thinking, maybe I should just start it wherever I’m compelled.



Works for me. I like the way you built up what the kid was staring at, trying to figure out. It made me look at the 'even bigger picture' of his chance meeting with Sally.

All in all, I like the flow very much. A little chaotic at times, but it pushes the story thru me at an alarming rate. Kudos for that.


-aaron


--------------------
"To seek freedom is the only driving force I know. Freedom to fly off into that infinity out there. Freedom to dissolve; to lift off; to be like the flame of a candle, which in spite of being up against the light of a billion stars, remains intact, because it never pretended to be more than what it is: a mere candle."

-Don Juan

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