Over the course of my life, I have been struggling with a certain kind of sexual addiction which inhibited me from really knowing or experiencing my own true erotic energy. It “usurped the throne”, so to speak, and profoundly interrupted my ability to contact my genuine sexuality.

So, out of desperation, I began finding my own way. I developed this practice only in order to seek out the erotic within myself. Not only did I accomplish that, but also, I believe, I took the first big step in really understanding what Spare was doing in using sex “as the technique and medium of a magical act.” Unfortunately, having taken up with a partner, I now find it very difficult to continue with this practice, as it is basically masterbating without any physical contact whatsoever. But I feel like passing it on to any of you lonely magickians out there.

Use your imagination, not for fantasy, but for sensation. Feel sexual energy circulating through your errogenous zones. I would imagine my phallus huge, powerful (like one of those Oriental erotic paintings) and throbbing with scintillating blissful energy. I would evoke erotic images, without becoming involved in a fantasy, that propelled me into a kind of trance. Images that were best were not graphic, but nevertheless were charged with arousal. The point here is to heighten and amplify sexual arousal, and the sensation of primal energy moving through you, until you are literally thrashing about, screaming.

It is at this point IME that the sexual energy transmutes into Will; and since the energy is now at boiling point out of desire for release, it has the potential to become “reified” into physical and spiritual reality.

Alas, I was not able find out how to take it to that point, as my sexuality is now fully channeled into the present relationship. But I hope that this exercise helps any of you out there.

Oh! And another thing, I sensed that as I was doing it, that I was calling a dakini (spirit/faery- tantric initiator) into my energy-field without even realizing it. Perhaps that is what Spare meant when discussing the benefits of intercourse with “succubi”