Speed Induced "hallucinations" Options

Now I know that everybody who has experienced "hallucinations" from staying up days on methamphetamine will almost always put it down to speed induced psychosis but after having a very lifelike conversation with a voice in after 3 days of sleep deprivation and lack of food im starting to question how imaginary these so called hallucinations really are.

Im interested in hearing opinions on the subject from occultists. I had no idea what psionics were until I had this experience. The voice talked about all sorts of things but at one point it said "Seeing as your more in tune with this dimension where deceased people reside, I can send you psionic frequencies". Also the voice asked me if it was my first psychedelic encounter.

Another very strange detail was the fact that after the voice told me it was going to give me a wet willy I actually felt a cold finger poke me in the back. It either felt like a cold finger or cold water seeping through my t-shirt.

Alot of very strange and unexplainable things happened. The voice seemed hellbent on convincing me I was dead too. It wanted me to face a certain direction and I noticed when I did the voice would get louder and more intense. At one point the voice said "Now that I have his undivided attention, I concentrate on his frontal lobe". I felt hands on each side of my face after that.

Something fairly strange that happened was after the voice told me I was going to get carpol tunnel syndrome my hands went ice cold and started sweating excessively for no logical reason.

Should I just assume it was my subconscious speaking to me or was there something else involved? The reason I posted in the psionics forum is because of that statement it made about psionic frequencies. I might have heard about psionics but I didnt know exactly what it was at the time.

If it was a spirit it definately was trying to scare me. The first threat was "Rivers are gonna run red with your blood" I found that more funny than scary but I replied to it by saying "Ive never hurt anyone and never would" the voice seemed surprised and said "No? I didnt think so, Ive stabbed 3 people and will do it again if I have to"

The voice kept saying "Just pack your bags and leave your dead already" and "I should take revenge after what you did to me" also it kept saying "Yeah your definately dead" and "Yeah we're definately deceased" meaning I had died. At one point I actually believed I had died of a speed overdose.

Heres a real weird detail I forgot to mention. One point the voice was saying "Whos that coming in your window" and "4 people trying to get into the bed, thats not gonna work" then I felt some tingling on my balls (that happens the odd time when I take ecstasy but never speed) and the voice said "Erica just wants to lick ya"

I found that unbelievably weird because I've never known any Erica's or even Eric's for that matter. Where the hell did that name come from. Thats when I thought my house might be haunted and the ghosts were trying to get me out by saying "Pack your bags and leave" also it said "Do you understand the message?" when Id say what message it replied "Go back to Ireland (my home country) and never come back.

Strange shit to say the least.

"Go back to Ireland and never come back."

I got that same message from a spirit sunday. That blows my mind.

I got that same message from a spirit sunday. That blows my mind.

Maybe there's an anti-irish spirit roaming the astral tormenting people. Maybe he's english.

A note on the nature of spirits though, it's often hard to judge the nature, good or evil or in between, from an external point of view. True, we consider classically 'good' spirits to be benevolent and kind-natured, encouraging and patient. But, the spirits I have oft tracked down for magickal advice have put me through psychological trials that sound similar to what our drug induced example shows. On reflection in the past, I had always afterwards needed to basically 'reorganize' my thoughts afterwards to purge any leftover 'psychosis'. I thought that perhaps some spirits, for whatever reason, need to 'shake you' a bit to make sure you can handle what they have to teach you.

Once I called for a spirit during a sort of 'open conjuration/astral jaunt', to help me understand the mechanics of telekinesis. He suggested all sorts of terrible uses of the ability once it is advanced, long before discussing the details of how to make it work in my brain. He seemed snide, and even malicious, and each time he displayed a new possibility that amounted to a psychic ego-stroke, I had to put us back on subject until finally he got down to business as though we were already familiar. Afterwards, while practicing, i would occasionally get sidetracked mentally into some daydream of power, and have to refocus my attention and assert to myself that that was not what I wanted this ability for. Each time i did, while it was going on, I'd get a sense that this same spirit was somewhere chuckling at his joke.

Strange stuff happens, and it's different for everyone. I think that a strong mind is simply defended against hidden influences, and adept at countering against blatant influences. Achieving expanded awareness or heightened consciousness is about efficiency of energy - mental dexterity, if you will. That's why even people with weak minds can reach heightened states with drugs, but when they do they flip out. A strong mind can stand its ground, a weak mind will cave under the influence.

Of course it's not anyone's place to judge drug use in others, but I do think that planning a six month reunion is kind of selfdefeating, ultimately. Speaking of shamanism, drugs are traditionally only the first aspect of the mastery of awareness and consciousness that they attain. After a time, such tools as ayahuasca are rarely employed by the more experienced shamans - they learned those paths with their earlier experiences, and then travelled them on your own. Someone said earlier that you can't get as 'high' with meditation as you can with drugs. Thing is, drugs are a physical tool, which create a physical reaction, which in turn promotes an energetic and thus mental effect. So, there is a physical high that comes with most drugs, and that's what you will get 'more of' with drugs than meditation. When it comes to the altered states though, I thoroughly disagree - there are states of consciousness not yet attainable with drugs for whatever reason. And it's possible that consciousness can sustain far more change of environment than the body can - reaching some states of consciousness by using bodily means like drugs might kill your physical body, when you're mind would have been only a little stressed by going there 'naturally'.

After you've learned how to use your mind in the way you were able to on drugs, the only excuse for doing them is fun. And there's nothing wrong with that, as long as you're honest with yourself. One lie begets another...

peace

aside: distillate, do you know of any books on that experience published by Richard Alpert, that sounds fascinating!