Fried Circuits, Burnt Fuses, And Blown Gaskets, Spirit repair advice please! Options

OK! well, this being my first actual post of any real material, I will try to start it off cool, if I can. Story time! Here goes:

So basically, I start out learning what I can....

...Ok. No problem.

I start experimenting with magicks and esoterica....

...Ok. Fine.

Once I gain momentum, I have a hard time slowing down...

...Wait, what?

In the heyday of my spiritual development, I was able to make psi-balls, change traffic lights, and cause astral-temporal distortions. Even so, there was one ominous factor in all this: I could never willfully astral project, no matter how powerful I got. I never really minded it until now. It turned out to be an omen of how healthy my spirit was at the time. So, how did I accomplish all that in such a short period of time? Long story short, I approached metaphysics, spirituality, magick, etc. with an Isshinryu*1 type of approach...

*1 Isshinryu is a martial art where instead of making an obvious defense, one defends themselves by routing the opponent's offensive by attacking their offensive rather than the opponent themself, in essence negating the attack.

... and basically ending up having a decent amount of time where I blew off the idea of grounding and shielding, and actually doing pretty well without it until I stepped on too many toes and the Karmic Bureau of Bounty Hunters were on my ass. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/butcher.gif) Yeah, I didn;t ahve to defend, when i could just negate any oppositions...until that happened.

One experience after another, my world came tumbling down. No more perfect speech patterns. No more dipping into latent past life memories for languages. No more pursuasion. No more healing others. No more counseling for trauma in friends. I was left off in a spiritual state something to the idea of someone with an intermediate to very advanced level of gnostic awareness with the spiritual vulnerability of a televangelist. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sculacciata.gif) (IMG:style_emoticons/default/baby.gif) ...Not a pretty picture. It was pretty hard to endure, and I learned something from the esoteric path of the "School of Hard knocks."

Well, it's nothing THAT bad. Maybe I exxagerated what I went through a bit too much. Either way, it was pretty damn ugly. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/uglyhammer.gif) Hey! At least I still kept my knowledge, and I am still writing magick and other theories to this day. Ideas are still flowing, So I was not cut off, but at the same time I have no way to really describe it.

Now, how do I describe the next part? Well...

*WARNING. GIANT METAPHORIC STORY USED AS A COMPARATIVE FIGURE. PLEASE EXCERCISE CAUTION. THANK YOU*

So basically, what to do if a circuit gets fried, you try to replace the parts, but there is still live energy flowing through it, pretty much almost the same amount that fried it in the first place? Like, (ok I dont know what kinds of standards they come in, so I will make one up) say that a small capacitor is blown, the resistors are melted, and the insulation is stripped, and there is still live energy? What is needed is a large capacitor, stronger resistors, stronger insulation, and generally a wider width to the current, right? So what's standard? Figure out a way to isolate the part away from energy so one can make the parts switch, fasten the parts, sodder them in if needed, and then release it from isolation, right?

Now comes the hard part.

So say my spirit after all my experiences, due to lack of rooting and shielding, has left me like a fried circuit? How do I replace the parts I need, but still avoid a total meltdown from so much damn ambient energy that I accumulated overtime? Some things and possibilities to consider:

1. This may not be the case. I could just be thinking too much.
2. try to find a hobby in contrast to using everyday spirit energies to work all the time.
3. Stop bad habits like smoking (mild psionic scrambling) and excessive masturbation (tantric release) to regulate energies and to keep the "live energy" from spilling out and then totally messing me up.
4. I need to find out how to properly shield, now that after so much time, rooting has finally been novicely grasped!

If my story or manner of speech confuses you, I severely apologize. I find it to be somewhat of a side effect of an improper approach, crash, and recovery from my incident(s) as mentioned above.

OR

Even shorter story, I pulled an Icarus, and above are the details. Any help based on all of this?

Any feedback, input, etc. is greatly appreciated.

This post has been edited by WyrdScience: Dec 28 2006, 02:08 PM

If by chance you are a dreamer you may be able to recover lost energy or find the source of this problem.

You kiddin? I dream like a stock stereotype pisces spirit! (even weirder that I am a gemini, thats another story). Whats a good way to channel dream energies? I always end up involuntarily evoking my own daydreams, and mouth each dialogue out! -_-;; *takes a deep breath and relaxes*

And Zug, even so what you said may be valid, crystal lattices and energy trappings within their structures (and strata? right word?) would first have to mimic the energy patterns of the individual AND be able to emulate their center. Not to discount what you say as a whole, but simply towards my own character personally. As for me, if I were to use crystal therapy, more or less the closest idea of my usage would be that of a "Recall Crystal," a stone which archives and logs various changes in aura and whatnot, like a medical style spiritual health rep sheet. Most likely, I would use a quartz to create a miniature archive, but for it to----you know what? scratch that. Eno was right, I DO think too much. Alright. Well, I dont have any crystals like that, and my hematite ring was shattered.

But, instead of being my usual pathological egomaniac I am, I would like to say a few things that DO work instead of what DOES NOT, concerning recentering, remembering, and recovery:

1. A vanilla based scent, somewhat feminine and gentle, but also a little musky.
2. A light wood burning smell, like that outside of a home when it's burning wood.
3. The thought and visual of a hearth.
4. A singing woman's voice, almost as a lullaby.
5. VAN HALEN!
6. Crimson sunset twilights.
7. Gothic Lolitas (SCORE!)

Ok, I know that it's sorta obvious and stupid, but other than the obvious, I still feel like something is missing. Does anyone have enough experience to make an analysis on my condition/character based on the things described, to perhaps see what I need to do or know to find myself? Perhaps there are questions that need to be asked? If it gets to that point, please PM me. Thank you.

Eno, Zug, thanks so much for the input. Isaiah, I understand where you are coming from, and many times it just feels like there IS no system setup for me. Just a huge @$$ volcanic shaft from where my beast comes out from. *remembers the effects of such experiences* *shudders*.

Other than whats about to come in terms of responses, how do i give you guys ratings??