Sigh.
I have been thinking about why i dont like where my life is.
I posted a topic motivation, thinking im too lazy.
i just wanted to avoid the simple truth.
I FAIL.
If soul's were eggs, mine would be a cracked easter egg filled with puss.
I cant keep a connversation.
i have no focus.
i put max effort into everything and maintain a positive attidude, and even add assistance with magic.
the magic fails.
i fail.
If i was a tarrot card i'd be the fool, devoid of any positive or negative qualities.
im just there,
a waste.
no one respects me.
no matter how much i respect myself.
its all in vain.
if you cant walk the walk, then talking the talk is just a load.
I try i try.
ive been training my body relentlessly
my spirit magically.
but im still to slow.
soul just stagnates and dies.
i was rejected by every girl i asked out.
most of them reply as if i was less than human.
I dont get picked last for sports because i dont even get picked.
even when the gym teachers are picking teams they leave me out.
my retarded classmate looks at me as if i was a circus freak.
because i am one.
effort and a positive attitude dont mean anything.
If they did then i would have seen the results ive been working on since i was a child.
but i never will.
thats the way the world works.
i see that now.
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