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Paimon Problems, He just won't go away. |
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Petrus |
Aug 19 2009, 09:37 AM
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Zelator
Posts: 227
Age: N/A Gender: Male
Reputation: 6 pts
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As I might have mentioned, I did an astral evocation of Paimon 4 or so months back. It was to bind some problems in a younger brother's behaviour. In terms of Paimon showing up, it definitely worked. I had mental verbal response from him, and exactly the kind of arrogance regarding the offering that Imperial mentions in his LiveJournal account.
For about two months after that, although for the most part I got the result I wanted, (Jeremy is still mildly obnoxious, but nothing I can't handle) things went fine, to the point where I forgot about the evocation.
Then about two months ago, I temporarily moved in with a guy in Melbourne who had emotional instability problems. One night I had the thought of re-summoning Paimon in order to bind this guy's anger, entirely randomly...and Paimon came back. The binding of that guy's anger though, for the most part didn't work. He was still unstable, and still yelled at me and was verbally abusive at times.
After that, however, I started having problems. The first thing I noticed was, whenever I'd try and do Japa, (mantra repetition) I'd suddenly be hit with paranoia about how similar Kali's (my patron) imagery is to some of the imagery that I've seen of Baphomet. I apparently still have psychological baggage where Satanism is concerned, and so for a little while, that really threw me for a loop.
The way I solved that problem though was by forcing myself to really focus on Baphomet for a few minutes at one point when I was being hit with that, in order to convince myself once and for all how different they were. I started getting back some really black energy which literally nearly caused me to vomit, and immediately stopped that. I then focused on how Kali has only ever made me feel positive, and gave license to depart, and for the most part, that problem has been solved since.
The other area however, where Paimon has really been attacking me hard, is the Faustian angle. There have been times where I have degenerated into a seething mass of fear and paranoia about the state of my soul, and I even actually had a fairly vivid dream only a few nights back where a supposedly "psychic" woman told me that a) I was going to die due to being stung by a massive swarm of bees the next day, and b) that I was going to Hell for having evoked Paimon. She was particularly mocking and vindictive; it wasn't a good experience.
The way that I've been mediating that is by continually repeating to myself either, "Tat Vam Asi," (that thou art) or simply, "my soul is my own." To some extent that works, but I'd be lying if I said it has completely. What really sent me into a psychological tailspin about a week ago though was when I read someone quoting Bardon on pacts on another forum.
In case anyone is wondering whether or not I've been banishing, yes, I have. I banish, and/or give License to Depart. Either one will work, but generally only for 24 hours, and then he's back. I made offering to Kali three or so days ago, and prayed to her about the problem, and felt that I got back the message that he would be taken care of. For said three days I've had peace, and so I gave a mental sigh of relief, thinking that the problem was finally solved.
When I woke up just a few hours ago, however, I felt a distinct presence in my bedroom. No accompanying thoughts; just a sense of unease in the pit of my stomach. I mentally gave Paimon License to Depart...and the feeling immediately went.
So how do I permanently get rid of him? I'm wondering if the real problem is the fact that aside from the initial bread and beer during the first evocation, I've never given him offerings of any kind. He actually asked for one a couple of times when I asked him to bind that former housemate's temper, but I still didn't, because I had thought that by the terms of Solomon's covenant with the spirits, I didn't need to. I also drew the Seal of Solomon during the initial evocation, so even though it was informal, I considered him bound by those terms. I had a particularly strong mental image of him attempting to break through a large astral/mental projection of that seal which was between him and me, during the evocation, but he was unable to.
I also, however, haven't made a permanent version of the seal, and according to someone else I've spoken to on another forum, that is what you must do in order to appease Goetics if they successfully fulfil a request, even though I never saw any mention of needing to do that for the sake of reward specifically, in the Lesser Key, although I know you are meant to make permanent seals for the purposes of the evocation itself. So I had been under the impression that you don't actually have to reward them in any way.
So...any advice? I know Bym is probably going to chew me out for this, and I also acknowledge that I deserve it, but at this point, I just want to know how to get rid of Paimon for good.
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Magical Evocation. All the fun of train surfing, without having to leave the house.
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Replies
Petrus |
Aug 19 2009, 01:53 PM
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Zelator
Posts: 227
Age: N/A Gender: Male
Reputation: 6 pts
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QUOTE(bym @ Aug 20 2009, 03:57 AM) Though I do not follow her ways...she is known to be quite excellent at thwarting demons of any nature.
Yes; the Devi Mahatmaya is about her slaying demons, more or less from cover to cover. QUOTE She demands a blood-price but then you know this. I've offered her some of my own at times before, quite willingly. That is definitely a good idea in this case. I haven't done that for a while, however, because I don't consider Mola Ram to be a positive role model, to be honest. (IMG: style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) I feel some balance needs to be maintained where the subject of blood comes up in relation to Mother. There are Vaishnava Hindus online who try to claim that it is actually offensive to Kali to offer her blood at all, and all I can say to that is to wonder whether they've actually read the Kalika Purana. On the other hand, I (hopefully) obviously am not going to consider emulation of Elizabeth Bathory to be morally appropriate, and certainly not socially! (IMG: style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) I've offered Ma a few drops in the past before, which I suspect She appreciates; and if I ever cut myself accidentally or fall over, I generally mentally offer her the result of that as well, but I'm not going to be going out at night hunting virgins any time soon. (IMG: style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) QUOTE Know that you cannot keep waffling from diety to diety to slake your thirst and then abandon them when something else comes along. As far as Gods are concerned I do not intend to, but I honestly did not know that working with Goetics was an act of apostasy. QUOTE This is the extent of my rebuke. I'm not here to judge you, why? we are our own judges. Embrace Kali. You know a part of her, now try to understand the rest. In dealing with demons it is not which god(dess) you worship but how you worship. Your faith must be seamless. I think you're correct that I have had faith issues. I guess it's just because I was thinking; Kali might be very powerful, I don't doubt that...but Paimon isn't supposed to be exactly a featherweight either, in the grand scheme of things. (IMG: style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) QUOTE Read between my lines. I'm trying to, but I seem to be a little dense at the moment. (IMG: style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) You weren't overly dogmatic, however. It is true that I can be a little flighty and addicted to instant gratification...but I like to at least hope that I'm slowly learning. This post has been edited by Petrus: Aug 19 2009, 02:14 PM
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Magical Evocation. All the fun of train surfing, without having to leave the house.
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Vagrant Dreamer |
Aug 19 2009, 05:41 PM
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Practicus
Posts: 1,184
Age: N/A Gender: Male
From: Atlanta, Georgia Reputation: 51 pts
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It doesn't sound to me like you evoked paimon appropriately in the first place, to offer my two cents. Although Kali is a powerful protector against demons, if it seems she has abandoned you it may be more of a test of faith, as well as your own power. Kali always felt like a stern mother to me, the kind who watches you fall down and dust yourself off, not offering comfort at that moment, but always ready to be there when you fall down and break something. She may see that this is something you can deal with on your own.
That said, another route would be to evoke Paimon properly and command him to leave you be. Another member had posted about invoking one of the goetic spirits to make his girlfriend love him, or something along those lines, and that it went sour later on - not surprising, and this case is not surprising either; unless they are appropriately bound, the spirits adressed in the lesser key don't have to do anything for you, and have the authority to accomplish whatever you ask of them in whatever way they want and to whatever extent they choose.
And in my experience that has been true of spirits outside the lesser key as well - sure we can call spirits, sure they will respond, and even do something for us or teach us something, but unless some kind of binding is in place, none of them are compelled to do anything, although some will be amicable when offered something. When it comes to those 'kind' spirits, you can often trust their judgement; when it comes to many others I wouldn't trust them to do what you want in the way you want, or to leave you alone afterwards.
peace
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The world is complicated - that which makes it up is elegantly simplistic, but infinitely versatile.
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Posts in this topic
Petrus Paimon Problems Aug 19 2009, 09:37 AM markus Hi Petrus,
I've been working with Paimon,and ... Aug 19 2009, 07:25 PM Petrus
My humble advice is, call him again apologize for... Aug 19 2009, 07:46 PM markus Hi Petrus,
Magick is a lifelong journey, we must ... Aug 19 2009, 09:16 PM Darkmage Truthfully, however, I've actually treated him... Aug 19 2009, 11:28 PM bym Greetings!
*sigh*
Petrus...when I refered to a... Aug 20 2009, 12:56 AM scryer Paimon doesnt like people that winge and complain ... Oct 5 2009, 10:42 AM StarFireRhythm Thanks for posting all this!
Weirdly enough, ... Oct 6 2009, 04:39 PM
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