To Forgive and To Forget, Really... how do you do it? Options

Have you had someone really important and beloved to you do something really bad/dissapointing/whatever to you which you simply cannot forgive, not to mention to forget? When in the end you ended up filled with so much hate, mixed with love and resentment no matter what you've tried to really forget and forgive? And the feeling still there like for 2 years as it kept popping into your head even when you were not intentionally want to think and when you least expected it? Well, maybe I'm in a bad mood today, but really... I want to hear your thoughts and experience on dealing with this.

I think that if you are a member of this forum you are astute enough to understand that forgetting is part of forgiving.  To forgive is to forget. 

I do not understand how there can be positive vengeance or retribution.  Both words are negatives.  If you are able to forget you should be able to forgive too.

.....some people will continue their destructive behavior until they are shown the consequence of their actions (IMG:style_emoticons/default/sculacciata.gif)
-maybe vengence is a bit strong word for that

....my recent experience with that was with a new boss at work that had a real social problems (he came to that position becouse he is related to the owner) ....anyway his new developed taste for power had to involve oppresing(in a big way) others inclouding his best friend(not any longer) just becouse he could get away with it
-i managed to stop "his best friend" from beating him to a pulp and devised a more suitable and legal solution ...and that was to give him the oportunity to show his true self to everyone...
-he ofcourse embaresed the firm and himself ...lost position, fiancee ....and everyone lived happily ever after......maybe he will learn the lesson eventualy

-i work with people and nothing suprises me anymore ....you must know how to protect yourself
...sometimes people need a bit of "tough love"

This post has been edited by Wanderer: Aug 20 2005, 06:18 PM