My mom sent me a bunch of pictures of the cabin we inherited from our grandad when he passed away, and tonight I was taking another look at them (I'm hella homesick, lol, looking at them has become a nightly ritual almost), and there is this one picture mom took of the cabin from the boat launch by our lake. Mom and dad had built a deck of sorts and used some old pews for benches, and in the picture there is this man sitting on the bench facing the lake. The man is dressed in a white t-shirt with black pants and looks like he's wearing a hat, which is what my grandad always wore, with suspenders (which I can't see, it's too far away, lol).

It doesn't look like my dad, because my dad has one of those awesome bellies that comfrotably lounge about, lol. My brother Never wears white, and there are no other vehicles on the property other than my parents suburban. I emailed mom asking her if I am going crazy and it's just one of the neighbors that could have walked up from down the road, or if it really could be my grandad sitting there.

Everytime I look at it though, I get this feeling...not creepy or fear...but almost...tingly sorta. It's so hard to explain. It's not strong, it's very very subtle...but enough to keep me staring at this picture for quite sometime until my eyes get buggy.

I'm hoping my mom will say that no one was there when she took the picture, because I really do miss grandad, even though he wasn't the easiest person to get along with, he still ruled.

Dad did spread half of his ashes in the garden after the funeral, and he did live there for like 23 years, so it would seem so natural that he wouldn't leave, y'know? It's still hard to not see him standing by the cabin door in only his pants, boots and suspenders whenever we drive down the little hill to the cabin, and not see him sitting at the kitchen table smoking and drinking coffee at 5 in the morning asking why we haven't gotten up earlier for breakfast of eggs and toast which are placed in front of him on the table no longer warm...but still delicious.

I miss him alot, and maybe it's just my mind wanting to see him again. I pray that isn't the case....I desperately want it to be him.

Anyways...I just needed to let that out to this corner of the world. It's been bugging the hell out of me and I need to just get it down. I'll let you know what mom says when she gets back to me if anyone is interested.

Thankx for taking the time to read this, it's much appreciatted.

Namaste