I breathe. No effect.
I concentrate. No effect.
I meditate. No effect.
I make reaffirmations in the mirror. No effect.
I tried rubbing essential oils on me. No effect.
Making tinctures? No effect.
Spells? Nothing.
Simple prayer: Nothing.
Started Exercising: Nada
Changed my diet: ZIP
Quit smoking: NOTHING

I swear I feel like this right now: (IMG:http://i127.photobucket.com/albums/p130/thexenomancer/RAAAAAAAAAGE50.jpg)

I STILL CAN'T ASTRAL PROJECT AND I AM PISSED.

I'm so disenchanted with my failed attempts that my basic system of belief in metaphysics is starting to dwindle. It's almost as if I have contracted a horrible curse that keeps me from practicing magic, receiving the benefits of magic, or bestowing blessings upon others. The same goes for psionics, divination, everything: It's all going down the shitter and making all my attempts feel like this:

(IMG:http://i127.photobucket.com/albums/p130/thexenomancer/fail.jpg)

I am just about on the precipice of my stress threshold with this, and I swear if I run into any more bullsh*t, I'll just pop one of these!

(IMG:http://i127.photobucket.com/albums/p130/thexenomancer/fukitol.jpg)

I'm about to pull the plug and give up on magic for good. I don't care anymore. Nothing works. And no one has been able to help worth crap. I think waiting about five years worth of metaphysical research is enough to start projecting. Hello!? Immortal beings out there?! I AM MORTAL AND MY TIME IS SHORT! WHERE'S MY BLESSING NOW!?

I swear, if there are beings out there stressing patience, understanding, wisdom, etc... they are arrogant bastards that don't give two sh*ts about humanity or the human mortal condition. They obviously don't know what it's like to be mortal, otherwise they would be bestowing blessings left and right, realizing that our immersion experiences are what count in human existence. Makes me wonder, if the universe is all-benevolent, and the actions of such beings are malevolent, could it be that they are non-existent at all? I'm starting to sound a lot like an atheist now. Man, I'm so pissed. Anyone else out there share my rage? Or have comments? I am very open to them right now, at least I feel more open to the comments of other humans than I do those arrogant pieces of sh*t gods that don't care worth crap of what I have to say, think, or do. At least I know that on the other end of the computer, there's a human criticizing me. At least that human is real.

...can you handle the rage?

I am so glad that I posted this in fight club.