Well, I've already made quite a few posts, but I'd might as well start here to help people get to know me better.

I commonly go by "The Xenomancer," just because that's my name, yo. I do that thing. I find things out in a weird way, know the unknown (or figure it out), and am generally a man of unorthodox methodologies!

I started esoterica over 2 years ago, with a rather rough start, but I gained the right direction overtime. Some of those sites will mess you up, lemme tell ya!

I started out with experience with EnKi, famous sumerian god, and started from there. Don't know what happened very much from then till now, either because alot of my memory is a haze or alot of my experiences are repressed memories now (yeah, EnKi is tough. I pulled an Icarus MANY times! I'm just thankful I am alive!)!

From there, I will say that I learned ALOT. My intro on that official intro page tells the rest, but other than that, I generally take an inclusive, ambivalent approach to alot of things.

My views on spirituality...well, I'll just start by saying that I believe that the Bible is a giant book of allegories and metaphors (hey, that's what works for me), and that I am a firm believer of love and balance. One of my favorite sayings based on that is...(tries to paraphrase), "to enter into hell for the sake of love will wield one heaven?" To me, thats what helps me realize and rationalize alot of things, such as if I happen to go Zen or something, but choose to get out of that state for the sake of someone else, I believe as a fundamental principle that the act to do so in itself is deserving of a reward even HIGHER than such, just because of it's unselfishness. I like to personally take on a stance which is a mix of Rafiki from Lion king, Yoda, and stereotypical martial art grandmasters.

So yeah, I try to be as inclusive with spiritual expressions as possible. One time a Necromonger-type female spirit was trying to court with me, and I was scared out of my wits. After a little fight on the dreamscape, I woke up, and with my -new brain- (or one that learned alot by my standards), I opened up my heart and said, "Oh! You just wanted to flirt! I'm sorry! You scared the fSck out of me!" I noticed that this superaccepting demeanor is dangerous, but I learned to balance it out in my own way by developing a "Budda's heart". That, and the fact that it's sort of an adaptation to having trouble with sheilding, so I just learn to take a zen-spirit disposition with alot of things, and that works out, for what its worth. Maybe thats the lesson I have to learn. I sure do miss having a disposition of my own choice though, rather than one of existential circumstance. From that standpoint, even if I know what it feels like, and what it's "all about," I don't feel ready to be there, just because...I want to be who I am rather than be -everything-. And that's my main motivation, I guess, in a nutshell.

But anyways, take all that, and what I learned, and....shKt, well, there's no real way to explain it now, just go look at my posts and responses, you'll figure out who I am from there!

But, it would at least help if I had some feedback and acknowledgement. I would be very greatful if the community would review my posts and tell me a bit of what they think about me, just because I need that individualized, ego-feed, grounding balance to all this ambivalence. Thanks!

~The Xenomancer