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Hey all!
I found this site not long ago, searching for people that might relate to some experiences I've been through. At this point, I'm simply studying magic, feeling out how it relates to my own perception of magic. I'd rather observe and learn than practice right now. I've come to see it like a spider weaving a web. The silk thread is raw psychic energy, while the web-spinning is like spellcasting. Every spider has silk, but will use it differently. Some spin intricate webs, while others simply wad it into a ball to use like a frog's tongue.
While I'm here, I hope to share what experience and knowledge I do have. If I'm lucky, someone will hand me the next piece of the puzzle.
Ok. But be careful, thats the same route I went. Achieving a state of gnosis can carry a hefty price, if you don't practice the methods to deal with that kind of stuff properly. Take care of yourself!