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 I'm Going About It Wrong., I mean, I have to be...!
Xenomancer
post Mar 17 2009, 03:38 PM
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Nothing significantly magickal for the past year or so now. I looked myself in the mirror, and after saying, "My, you're a handsome devil!" I proceeded to have a dialogue.

"You know what?"
"What?"
"I'll tell ya what. I've pursued the metaphysical path for a number of years now, and I feel no closer to any changes in my personal self that I sought years ago."
"So how do you come by that conclusion?"
"Well, let's look at some things: I had experiences that I couldn't explain, and when I tried to replicate them, I failed horribly. The more I apply science to my workings, the less they work."
"So Science doesn't apply?"
"In my experience, no."
"Elaborate, please?"
"Different medications, food, sleep schedules, none of these seem to have any sway over my metaphysical ability, as it affects others who have varying degrees of difference in these factors. If I sleep well, the man across the street with sleep deprivation can astral project. If I stay up, the man next door can predict the future after a full night's rest. The more I experiment, the less results I get."
"Then what experiences can you say you had?"
"I can't really say anymore. In retrospect, I can't even say if they were real or not. The thing about -reality- is that experience is what fortifies it. Constant exposure helps root whatever it is you are experiencing at the time, and the fact that I rarely succeeded in my metaphysical endeavors makes me look back and question the feasibility of such phenomenon."
"So who is at fault for your lack of progress in this field?"
"You know, the responsible answer would be 'myself,' but on the other hand, I don't really know about that either. I know that I did my best, to the best of my understanding, the best of my ability, and the best of my effort all put into one focused force. Is it my fault for not getting anywhere? Perhaps. Perhaps not. I can't say, since I don't know very much about anything on this subject. I have no consistent variables to check against to see if something was my fault or the fault of any other conditions."
"Ah, but look what you did just now: You applied science to your metaphysics. You, yourself observed the effect that has on your workings."
"So, what, do you suggest I just forget the whole thing and ride the next metaphysical experience like a surfer on a TOTALLY NARLY wave?"
"Totally."
"Whoa."
"F'sure."
"But I want something metaphysical to happen to me. That's what I want. Why am I not experiencing anything?"
(Silence)


I look deep down, and find not a single clue to an answer. Guidance please?

What things are consistent with magickal results? Or am I asking the wrong questions?

If possible, please give me an example(s) of questions that I should ask myself, because for all I know, I could be digging for the right answer in the wrong place.


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-Never learn the Art of Sword before the Art of Dance. - Celtic Proverb
-Even with spiritual power, an unchecked ego will only seek to deify itself. - Frank MacEowen
-One cannot traverse waters without causing waves. - Xenomancer
-I find it interesting that we as scholars of metaphysics have no problem discussing the intricacies of the threads of reality, but when it comes to the things that really matter, we forget them. - Xenomancer
-This world is your home. We have a mix of everything here. If you want better, make better. There's no rule of going elsewhere for the tools. That's what magick is about. - Xenomancer

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davisxmonster
post Mar 18 2009, 07:27 AM
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i have the same problem (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

Lol

i tend to complain about it alot on these forums, and eventually a certain member got tired of me and said to just shut up and practice.

actually thinking about why you fail too much takes away from practice.

repitition is key.

at least that's what i think.

you may want to wait until a more experienced member gives you advice though

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esoterica
post Mar 18 2009, 08:02 AM
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if you think you are doing it wrong, then you will be - to be something, you have to live like you are doing that something correctly

first i would say to very carefully define what you mean by wrong - to vague has too many places for real abilities to hide

"I feel no closer to any changes in my personal self that I sought years ago" is so vague as to allow no success ever

as for me "i need to maintain what i've got" is what i need to do, but that is also too vague - i needs to be highly detailed to link to the subconscious, non-physical mind

until you sit down and discover within yourself specifically what you want to do or achieve, you will never succeed

let's say you wanted to duplicate harry potter's fictional abilities (talk to snakes, be able to perform a litany of certain spells, fly around on a broom) you'd first better list out the litany of spells and how they should work, so that you know when you are doing them right, and you'd better make a start on building a broom

all the book suggestions and courses and advice people here are giving you, is that list of abilities to emulate - you must choose between them (the path you want to follow)

digest the information here, choose, decide firmly on what you want to be able to do, then work on doing it - yes, practice and repeat forever is a good suggestion, as long as you know what to practice

there are a million people wanting to "do magic", but only a very few succeed - why?


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+ Kinjo -
post Mar 18 2009, 08:29 AM
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How well can you liven up the role you've chosen to play? There may lies your answer. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/bigwink.gif)


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plainsight
post Mar 19 2009, 02:53 PM
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The metaphysical and science in this age don't mix. The only thing science is good for, in such, is to prove to someone else, that you're not insane. You may spot a UFO in the sky, or have a ghost whisper into your ear, but if you can't prove it to someone else, you'd be labled a nut. I don't consider myself anti-science, its processes has proven metaphysical ideas.

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blueviceroy
post Apr 8 2009, 12:56 PM
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Debating with the ego is usually an act in futillity. To truly achieve the conditioning neccessary to be"successfull" one should strive to exist in a state free of the desire to "possess". By that ,one should strive to be comepletely free of the desire or need to "have" something, or to reach a certain superior state. There is no superior state of being in this existence. We exist in the moment as we are for many reasons , and chief among them is this drive to possess or controll.
Growing free of conditioning requires the agreement of the ego. To recuit the ego to a workable partnership, we need to show that our higher self is capable of being in charge, and making choices that benifit .
Perhaps asking simple questions relating to the basic state of our existence could lead you to some understanding . What is a human being? That question has opened doors for this one .

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Acid09
post Apr 8 2009, 07:59 PM
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Well you said that you want something metaphysical to happen to you, so I'll start with that.

Maybe ask yourself:

What truly is metaphysical?
How would my life change if something metaphysical happened to me?
Why is experiencing a metaphysical event important to me?
What would I rather be doing, if anything at all?
How will a metaphysical event make a me a better person?
What can I do to make myself a better person outside of metaphysical persuits?


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Mchawi
post Apr 13 2009, 06:01 AM
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Don't think... do....

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Firephoenix
post Apr 15 2009, 07:55 PM
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I used to have this problem when I started. My problem was that (like everything else I do) I was overthinking everything. I can only speak for myself, but confidence had a ton to do with it. I looked in books and asked other people, and finally I realized that everybody elses way didn't work for me. I have to do things my way or nothing works. I can get ideas from other people, but I have to do things my own way.

For example, I am big on vizualizations and not so big on ceremonies and big productions. So everything I do is in my head and powerful, I can feel it. I also experiment with intensifying certain "rituals." You just have to find what works best for you. What you need to ask yourself is "what are my strengths?" and "what are my weaknesses?" For me to do a bunch of motions just bores me and makes me lose focus. For others it gets them in the mind-frame that they need to be in.

I hope this helps a little. Good luck!

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Vilhjalmr
post Apr 17 2009, 09:43 PM
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I think Mr. Red Text has it right on the dot. To attempt to forget about concepts like evidence, proof, and experiment is to willingly delude yourself, because you have decided that you can't get any results with your eyes open.

If I may ask, what sorts of thing have you studied and tried? I am no expert, but if you want tangible results, I would wager that Wicca (for instance) is probably not the best sort of magic to include your experiments.


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Xenomancer
post Apr 22 2009, 07:36 PM
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QUOTE
If I may ask, what sorts of thing have you studied and tried? I am no expert, but if you want tangible results, I would wager that Wicca (for instance) is probably not the best sort of magic to include your experiments.


Taoism, chaos magick, astrology, a bit of herbal magick, a little conjuration, evocation, and invocation, a little psionics, and some (emphasis on some) astral projection. All things inconsitent.

QUOTE
What truly is metaphysical?

An experience or accomplished feat that can be replicated by one's own effort, but not replicated by modern scientific methods. In a way, an ability that one has that cannot be emulated by the science of the times, but can be replicated purely on that one person's effort.
QUOTE
How would my life change if something metaphysical happened to me?

I would probably change my life's priorities. Instead of trying to focus on the material, transient aspects of life, I would make the eternal a priority upon realizing it's presence in my life.
QUOTE
Why is experiencing a metaphysical event important to me?

Because I want to believe that there is something waiting for me more than just this mundane life. I want to know, in full consciousness, that something amazing awaits me after all my troubles in life are whisked away by a final breath in my old age. It is important to me because I believe that a metaphysical event will inspire me to not worry about my life so much.
QUOTE
What would I rather be doing, if anything at all?

The same thing I'm doing now, but done so in full knowledge and awareness of what's out there and where I fit in all of it.
QUOTE
How will a metaphysical event make a me a better person?

In one word: Awareness. Knowing that there is more afoot to things than they seem will keep me one step ahead in life so that I can change factors in my favor so that, in turn, I can lead a potentially happier life.
QUOTE
What can I do to make myself a better person outside of metaphysical persuits?

Work out. Eat healthy. Study harder.

Good questions, Acid. Now that I asked myself, I have my intentions charted out now, and done so honestly. So what do I do with that?


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¡HA HA! ¡ESTOY USANDO EL INTERNET!
-Never learn the Art of Sword before the Art of Dance. - Celtic Proverb
-Even with spiritual power, an unchecked ego will only seek to deify itself. - Frank MacEowen
-One cannot traverse waters without causing waves. - Xenomancer
-I find it interesting that we as scholars of metaphysics have no problem discussing the intricacies of the threads of reality, but when it comes to the things that really matter, we forget them. - Xenomancer
-This world is your home. We have a mix of everything here. If you want better, make better. There's no rule of going elsewhere for the tools. That's what magick is about. - Xenomancer

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Wanabeee
post May 5 2009, 01:35 AM
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hello Xenomancer you are right!!! when i first saw your photo i thought you were a handsome fellow (IMG:style_emoticons/default/13.gif) Lmao (IMG:style_emoticons/default/laugh.gif)
but seriously what i would recommend to your situation is firstly to let go of this expectation you have concerning your magical ability b/c for me in my experience it has always been based on my intention and expectation. where you are right now mentally is just as important as being spiritually prepared for the feat you are trying to attempt.
Give yourself a vacation : the aim of which is to distance your belief from your expectation. then after you feel an adequate amount of time has passed, try a simple AND engaging whole body energy work meditation. the aim is to take it slow and be easy about it .
One meditation i might recommend would be the tree meditation where you mentallly become a tree. With roots growing deep into the core of the earth and leaves and branches absorbing energy from the solar winds in space.
or you could try the regardie middle pillar technique or whatever energy meditation you feel most comfortable with .


hope this helps
Wanabeee buzz buzz (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

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Vagrant Dreamer
post May 5 2009, 04:47 AM
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QUOTE(Xenomancer @ Apr 22 2009, 09:36 PM) *

I would probably change my life's priorities. Instead of trying to focus on the material, transient aspects of life, I would make the eternal a priority upon realizing it's presence in my life.


There is often a lot of poo-pooing on faith in some parts of the magical community, especially those of us seeking a grounded 'scientific' approach to magical development. However, I found personally that the bulk of my own magical development was greatly enhanced by the assumption of the presence of the 'eternal' in my life. This perspective change took a while to really settle into my unconscious where so much of the magical action of will and intention occurs (or is hampered), but once it did so permanently truly incredible things began happening on a regular basis, so much so that I now have to stop and appreciate them once in a while to keep from taking them for granted.

It's difficult to make that commitment, shift priorities, and submit to a higher will that you aren't even fully aware of yet, but in many ways that is one of the keys to true initiation. Ironically the more we try to prove it to ourselves before we commit, the less real it appears to be. I think possibly it's because of the mindset behind requiring 'proof' before commitment - its based in materiality, and what we're seeking is immaterial; though also in some ways the essence of all material things at the same time.

Even the more materially based metaphysical sciences work on similar principles - take qigong for instance. Utilizing only the material practices like stance, movements, stretching, etc., the practitioner only gets so far, perhaps the peak of physical health and greater overall energy. However it isn't until the practitioner opens his mind to the concept of qi as a real energy and works internally under the assumption that his intention will lead that energy, regardless of his immediate awareness of it, that he can learn to direct and cultivate that energy to achieve a higher level of mastery and results.

Look at the world through the lens of eternity, or what you imagine that might be in any case, and begin to make it a real factor in your life. Consider everything from a greater picture and spend time regularly acknowledging that higher force in your life, and in the world. Act as though you are already aware of it, factor it into your decisions, plot possibilities and consequences accordingly. By and by, it becomes as natural as breathing, and if you aren't paying attention, awareness of that immaterial reality will creep up on you as if it had always been there.

QUOTE

Good questions, Acid. Now that I asked myself, I have my intentions charted out now, and done so honestly. So what do I do with that?


Acid may have something else to say on the matter, but I would say my take on the 'next step' would be basically what I suggested above. You don't have to make the perspective change in it's entirety this very moment, that would be impossible. But you can start by simply acknowledging the eternal, as you've coined it, almost in the way of giving it a nod, and sitting quietly whiel your mind attempts to connect with it. Do it often enough and your awareness will naturally grow to include it.

We take for granted the tight structuring our minds undergo from the time we are born until we are adults, and how much more continues to occur even then. If we continue to take a structure based approach to development into an unstructured reality, all we get is more structure. We have to strike a balance somewhere if we are to merge the structured and unstructured to any degree. We can't go from one to the other 'cold turkey'. It's similar to the concept of Wu Wei, and Formless Form. Empty Fullness, Doing No-Thing, etc. Allow your consciousness to rebel against it's structural cage for even moments a day, and you'll find that balance eventually and be able to move between them with increasing ease.

peace

This post has been edited by Vagrant Dreamer: May 5 2009, 04:47 AM


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Vilhjalmr
post May 5 2009, 03:58 PM
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If we have Wu and Wei, where is Shu?


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Xenomancer
post May 5 2009, 10:09 PM
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QUOTE(Vilhjalmr @ May 5 2009, 05:58 PM) *

If we have Wu and Wei, where is Shu?


In the newest version of Dynasty Warriors. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/viannen_55.gif)


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¡HA HA! ¡ESTOY USANDO EL INTERNET!
-Never learn the Art of Sword before the Art of Dance. - Celtic Proverb
-Even with spiritual power, an unchecked ego will only seek to deify itself. - Frank MacEowen
-One cannot traverse waters without causing waves. - Xenomancer
-I find it interesting that we as scholars of metaphysics have no problem discussing the intricacies of the threads of reality, but when it comes to the things that really matter, we forget them. - Xenomancer
-This world is your home. We have a mix of everything here. If you want better, make better. There's no rule of going elsewhere for the tools. That's what magick is about. - Xenomancer

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Vilhjalmr
post May 6 2009, 12:26 AM
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Hell yes. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif) I'm glad someone recognized it... I love that game!


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esoterica
post May 6 2009, 05:13 AM
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magic, to me, is a way to get things that i can't normally, or to do things i can't normally - there are things needing to be done, from protecting the house and grounds, to slapping down entropy and holding things together in their status quo, to exploring nether-space and the entities therein, to obtaining windfall money, funding and work contracts, doing glamourie so i fit in the redneck community where i live, and just generally having 'good luck' and avoiding problems, and that is where magic is useful, and also where it is abused by the powers that be to push us hither and thither (like back into a stable economy for instance, anybody else feeling that pushing?)

This post has been edited by esoterica: May 6 2009, 05:14 AM


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