QUOTE(Xochipilli @ Jun 13 2007, 10:56 AM)
Can you elaborate on that ASH? You mean its my path thats causing such negative side effects that come with sleep deprivation?
When you say my path what do you mean? The fact that im using chemicals and sleep deprivation to learn things? I learn so much about the mind and myself in the space of about 30 hours when its all said and done im left with anything but regrets but then again I think theres a price to pay for taking shortcuts to learning these kind of lessons.
Like I said i havent taken any drugs at all in about 4 months but the last time i did i learned all sorts of things but again i thought I was going to die. I even checked myself into the hospital because I was getting a burning plastic smell everywhere i went and I got the impression it was my brain i was smelling.
A voice kept repeating the word "serendepity" and when i looked in teh dictionary the next day it made complete sense. I was stumbling upon all these realizations without any conscious effort. Its as if my mind was showing me vulnerabilities and preying on them so id do something about them. I had all sorts of signs and synchronicity too. Not good ones though unfortunately. Nothing positive about them. They all had to do with the notion that I was too much of a free thinker and I had one foot in the grave because of it.
By the way what language is that Quechua?
Xochipilli...allow us to work from the end to the beginning. The language you ask of is Nahuatl. Its living and spoken language of the Mexica (Aztec) because its still spoken in various parts of Mexico. (link)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nahuatl
Im sure your aware...but Ill say it anyways...your name is Nahuatl for "Prince of Flowers"
Xochipilli was the god of love, games, beauty, dance, flowers, maize, and song in Aztec mythology. (link)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xochipilli
Hes also on the Mexican currency. 100 pesos equivalent to 10 US dollars (link)http://www.mexico-azteca.com/Monnaie/100pesosr.jpg
Heres a quote from that article "In the mid-1800s, a 16th-century Aztec statue of Xochipilli was unearthed on the side of the volcano Popocatépetl near Tlamanalco. The statue is of a single figure seated upon a temple-like base. Both the statue and the base upon which it sits are covered in carvings of sacred and psychoactive plants including mushrooms etc." Keep in mind that many of the ancients used psychoactive drugs for various reasons, including but not limited to: divination, communication with the gods, enlightenment etc. So its easy to see that Xochipilli has some connection to this. Apart from being the god of dance, music was very important in all of the Mexica rituals...to this day they continue to be. Why you chose this name...or why it was given to you is another topic. "Serendipity." Perhaps. But what have you found? What has found you? I have read some of your threads and they seem riddled with questions instead of revelations, or answers to something your in search of. People still use psychoactive drugs as an aid toward whatever journey their going on. I know. Cause I did the same with mushrooms, acid, and a little weed. Thing is...it wasnt fun anymore when I became a full blown heroin addict. Sure I stayed up a few days myself slamming crystal...I was sprung on the needle...everything was shot up. No smoke or rails. Anyhow, thats one of the reasons why I find myself here. The thing to keep in mind is...why do you continue to use after all the things youve been exposed to. If you tried running across a highway and got hit by a car would you do it again? Why continue on that path of self-destruction? If you insist on using...crystal is synthetic. Its not natural. Highly dangerous after prolonged use. If you insist on using for religious/magical reasons you should do it in the company of others...something like a "Maria Sabina" type thing. (link)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maria_Sabina
Ill be honest with you. Im a recovering drug addict. Ive been clean a little over 2 years. The thing I had to learn the hard way was...its not so much the amount and the times you use...its your reaction to the drugs when it is that you use. For example: some people use three times a day, every day, and end up in jail. Others, use once in a while and just totally f%#k things up. A real life Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Remember...I speak of myself and myself only.
Your path. Doesnt seem a good one because as I mentioned before...you end up with more questions than answers. Questions of your inner self and no inner peace. It doesnt seem like enlightment to me if you have not and can not seem to face your traumas, complexities, frustrations, and resentments. You only seem to add more of them. You seem to close yourself to life. Life and its lessons arent expensive, last time I checked, theres no bill to pay...they are taught to you when youre ready. Its all over this forum...little leaguers shouldnt be trying to play in the world series. You and your dreams need no wicked medicine...sleep and its dream state are natural cycles. I think its unwise to tamper with nature in this way. You posted a thread about some dream herb, yet spend days awake. Not too long ago I had problems with insomnia and tried valerian, wasnt too bad. I hope I dont offend you. Tlazocamati. This is a poem I read at the following site:http://www.freewebs.com/tecpaocelotl/poetry.htm
and I quote:
"Tochihuitzin Coyolchiuhqui
One of my favorite poets. This poem is about how life itself is an illusion.
Thus spoke Tochihuitzin,
thus spoke Coyolchiuhqui:
We only rise from sleep,
we only come to dream,
it is not true, it is not true,
that we come on earth to live.
As an herb in springtime,
so is our nature.
Our hearts give birth, make sprout,
the flowers of our flesh.
Some open their corollas,
then they become dry.
Thus spoke Tochihuitzin,
thus spoke Coyolchiuhqui."