The summary of my magickal career is inertia, and I have heretofore been woefully unsuccessful in changing that quality. Though I've been exposed to dozens upon dozens of magickal texts, grimoires, and manuals, I have for some reason been unable to take that exposure to the next natural step: implementation/practice of the material studied. It isn't the fault of the various texts, mind you. They're easy enough to follow and, for the most part, organized enough for me to use them on a practical level. The fault rests with me and, in turn, one of my more prominent character traits.
I'm a procrastinator...an acute procrastinator. Twenty page thesis papers will not deter me from beginning work on them a couple of days before due date. So what if I'm plummeting to my potential death with my skydiving chums; I'll pull the ripcord for my chute in due time...a number of nanoseconds before reaching the minimum altitude for safe deployment (IMG:
style_emoticons/default/smile.gif). Procrastination is my cross to bear, and it has severely affected my progression in my magickal studies. I continually put off doing even the most basic exercises that would initiate me into a given system of magick. "I'll attain spiritual enlightenment eventually," I'd virtually tell myself time and time again.
I'm changing though. The procrastination that so plagued me for the first two decades of my life is diminishing significantly, and with that change comes what can only be described as a yearning to consummate my study of magick through actualization, which is why I'm here at SM.
Being in the company of like minds can only benefit my studies in both the short and long term. I hope to learn from as many of you as possible in order to catalyze my practice of the magickal arts, solidify my choice in magickal paths (which is at present ceremonial magick), or adopt a new, more personally appropriate one as I accumulate more and more knowledge. In short, I hope to successfully complete the transition from a procrastinating academic of magick to a full-fledged member of the Wise.
Wish me luck!